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She tells you that you just don't
understand her, and that she really wishes that you would just do more "little
things."
It's not the big things that make her happy; it's paying attention to the little
details and showing you care that is really meaningful. She doesn't necessarily
need lavish gifts -- she needs to know you're thinking about her.
Here are some ideas to get you started doing these "little things" she really
wants:
1. Rub her feet instead of asking her if she wants you to rub her feet. Make it
look like you want to do it.
2. Make her dinner one night. Don't ask her if she wants you to make dinner.
Make her dinner before she gets home.
3. Light a candle so that she arrives home to a nice environment instead of
coming home to the glaring lights of the television and other things.
4. Send her a text in the middle of the day telling her "I miss your smile from
this morning" or "Last night was amazing!" or "The conversation we had last
night was great."
5. Send an eCard in the middle of the day... something cute to remind her how
much you really care about her.
6. If she's going on a business trip, offer to drive her to the airport or pick
her up to make her life that much easier.
7. Let her have control of the remote control. Don't monopolize it for a change.
Just give it to her and let her actually sit there and enjoying watching one of
her shows. Then you can share one of her interests by watching it with her.
8. Offer to iron one of her shirts or take her clothes to the dry cleaner.
9. Clean up the bathroom without being asked. Don't just sit there and ignore
the mess around the toilet. If you know it drives her crazy to see water
splashed all around the sink, dry that area after you use it.
10. If you work out together, enjoy it with her instead of rushing through your
own workout and then not letting her workout at the same time.
11. Take a shower together, then wash her hair, scrub her back, and give her a
spa treatment. Do this and enjoy it!
12. The next time she gives you a massage, give her a massage the next day.
Offer it! Don't just say you'll give her a massage...do it!
13. Surprise her by making plans. Tell her, "We're going out tonight honey." You
can even just go out for a drink or dinner somewhere. It's taking the initiative
that's important.
14. Decide on and set aside one night a week as date night. Have a date like
when you first started dating.
15. Call her in the middle of the day and just say hello. Don't wait for her to
call you.
It can be simple to keep her satisfied. It's not necessarily about what you give
her financially or what gifts you give her. That's a cop out. It's the little
things. The guy who makes the biggest mistake is the one who ignores their
significant other then all of a sudden give them an expensive gift to make up
for it. That doesn't make up for it at all.
Research shows that adventurous men and women have more testosterone good
for libido. You can amp up the intensity of your relationship by heating up the
intensity of your activities.
That doesn't mean that you necessarily need to do something really risky, like
skydive or punch out a paparazzi. But it does mean that adding a little element
of risk to your typical Saturday to-do list will make you - and your
relationship - feel a little more alive than usual.
Take a rock-climbing class, or book a white-water rafting trip. Not up for that?
Riding a roller coaster will give you a quick shot, as will seeing a scary
movie.
It's good for relationships when each party has his or her own interests. She
goes to yoga three days a week; he plays Ultimate Frisbee on Sunday afternoons.
Space is good.
Routine is great when it comes to some things like car maintenance, but routine
can also be the drizzle on the tinder of a hot relationship. So, here's what you
do: Identify one part of your relationship where you feel like you're in a rut,
and find a way to break that routine. This will help you overcome the obstacles
to sex that everyone faces.
Have some drinks and play a board game like Sorry and each time you get
sent back you have to take a drink. It's safe because you are not driving and
alcohol lowers some peoples inhibitions. Which can make for an interesting
night.
It doesn't have to be a major overhaul, just subtle changes that send the
message to your partner that you're going to keep the surprises coming. If
Sunday is chores day, plan brunch out with a group of friends, instead-but make
sure you order wisely each and every time (go ahead, have the Bloody Mary).
Role playing is a great way to spice things up. With my hubby I've already had
wild sex with the "pizza delivery boy", "taboo" sex with my "teacher", meet him
at the door with nothing but his trench coat, boots and a smile on. We send
erotic text messages on our cell phones throughout the day. Be creative, let
loose and find what works for the two of you...it can be free and promises for
an exciting evening for both of you!
If you haven't had sex on a Monday since the Bangles were popular, hit
the sack instead of watching the State of the Union Address on January 28th.
Go work out at the gym together, then when you get home, hop in the shower
together! Works every time!
But more than you do now, make a point to watch, participate in, or ask
about each other's outside activities. She'll be thrilled that he's risking his
hamstrings and dignity to experience what downward dog is all about; he'll be
ego-stroked when she's sitting on the sidelines as he hits disc pay dirt.
Independence is good, interdependence is better.
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